Ask Nothing.
The Best Antique I Ever Found
And
How I Found It.
By
A. Picker
Chapter Seven
“Irene. Do you think it’s Richard who offered
Ursula more for the painting?”
“No
Toni. But I do think I know who it
might be and... well, we all know him including Richard.”
“Really? WHO?”
“I’m
not sure but. On Saturday; last
Saturday: Mr. Cando (CAN-do)
brought that breakfront I bought from Tyler over to the store. I made him bring it right into the
front of the shop. Anyway. He had to bring the valances too. I bought those too. Tyler wouldn’t sell those separately. Tyler still thinks they go with the
breakfront. Anyway. I bought those so Mr. Cando had to load
those from over on Ferris. When he
went there he said that Richard was there and he was showing Tyler some
photographs.”
“THAT
BASTARD! OH!”
“Now
wait. Mr. Cando said it was
FURNITURE. They were pictures from
inside a house he said. They let
him look at them. I think it’s
that Gilman house; the one’s Richard knows who are moving. Richard thinks their stuff is really
good. Anyway. That’s what Mr. Cando told me and that
Tyler was looking at them pretty hard.
But he’s not gonna want that stuff. He knows better then that. But he COULD have showed him a picture of the painting
too. If he really did take one.”
“He
TOOK ONE!. Ursula wouldn’t say
something like that. She said he
was going to show it to his auctioneer.
Can you believe that! I’m
gonna. OH. So you think Tyler could have made the
big offer. To Richard? And he’s gonna tell Ursula? He’d do that. HE would.”
“Mr.
Cando didn’t say anything about a painting. I mean: I
didn’t ASK him. But you know how
he is about paintings. HE’D
LOOK. Mr. Cando LOVES
paintings. But: You know what: IF he’d seen a PAINTING don’t you think
he’d of asked ME. I mean. HE shows me every painting he ever
gets. Right? Just the other day he had the two
landscapes. OH they were
awful! But he LOVED them. They were Italian. With the crummy frames. Especially if those two thought it was
valuable. HE’D LOOK. Mr. Cando; ever since he sold that one
portrait he thinks ANY painting is, you know THOUSANDS.”
“But
he didn’t say he saw a painting.”
“That’s
right. But. If Richard had a photo you know he’d
show it to Tyler. He knows Tyler
won’t go to Ursula’s and he knows Tyler would know any painting well enough to
give him a guess-to-mate.
Especially if it’s Ursula’s.
They’d try to screw her.
You know. They don’t care.”
“Well. When I first saw it... I told her
nothing at first. I admit
that. Then I told her one
sixty-five. I didn’t do that
right. She knew it was better then
that. This time; when I was over
there yesterday, the painting was gone.
She said she put it upstairs.
I didn’t see it. Tyler wouldn’t
go there do you think?
“Tyler
go there? But he hates
Ursula. You know what he calls
her: FILTHY LYING BLANK and I know
what blank means!”
“Poor
Ursula. I’m glad he doesn’t go
there anymore. WAIT A MINUTE! You know what. I BET he WOULD go there! OH!” I said to Irene but it was really
to myself.
“But
he hasn’t been there in years, Toni.
And he has Richard telling him everything.”
“YES
but he’d still GO THERE if that painting WAS GOOD. I mean if it’s THAT GOOD. Just because he doesn’t go there doesn’t mean he CAN’T go
there. THAT’S what he’d do! He’d see Richard’s picture, Richard
tell him it’s at Ursula’s and then he’d, you know, mutter something and... wait
until Richard left and GO RIGHT OVER THERE. WHY NOT!”. As I
said this I realized this is EXACTLY what was happening!
“Toni. He wouldn’t do THAT. To Richard?”
“WHAT! Are you kidding me! Of course he’d do that! I’D DO THAT!
“You’d
do that? Toni! When would you ever do that?”
“YOU’D
DO IT!”
“I’d
do it? No I wouldn’t. I’d never do anything like that.”
“You
would to. If you saw that painting
you would.”
“That
is an idea Toni. Maybe I SHOULD go
there. I know Ursula well
enough. She knows me. I’d just say you told me about the
painting and I can pay more then you!
That would fix you wouldn’t.”
“YOU
wouldn’t do THAT! Irene. Come on!”
“But
you just said I would.”
“OH! NOT like THAT!”
“Well. Like what then?”
“WAIT
A MINUTE. That’s not a bad
idea! IRENE. YOU COULD DO THAT! Go to Ursula. Say you heard about the painting. Say I told you.
Say you’d told me you were going to go see it. Say how you would know how much it’s worth! She’d believe you! She WOULD. You know she thinks your, like, Mrs. QUALITY. IRENE! That’s IT. We
can do that.”
“Toni. We?”
“NO. REALLY.”
“Toni. Mr. Cando is probably doing THAT TOO.”
“Mr.
Cando isn’t going to Ursula to buy the painting. Come ON.”
“But
he goes there all the time Toni.
He brings her his things.
You know that.”
“But
Ursula doesn’t show him anything.
Even Ursula knows he won’t pay anything. He doesn’t have any money.”
“But
he could SEE it. And tell Tyler”.
“You
know what! If Mr. Cando saw that
painting I bet he WOULDN’T tell Tyler because HE’D want it so bad. Mr. Cando would DIE if he saw that
painting.”
“Oh...
now... it’s that good Toni? Mr.
Cando would want it for his collection?
Mr. Cando knows nothing about painting. HE wants EVERY painting for his collection just because he
figured out it IS a painting. It’s
really a good painting Toni?”
“Well. Not THAT good but good enough for
Richard. For Tyler. For me. And that’s good enough for Mr. Cando. I BET it’s Tyler whose seen it. And he’d start his line on Ursula about
the auctioneer. He’s always
putting stuff in auction.
EVERYTHING he has is gonna go to auction; you know his lines: That where it brings the most. I can just hear him.”
“Yes
Toni, but... this time... I don’t know.
He hates Ursula and even Richard knows it. Ursula won’t sell anything of her mother’s and that’s all
Tyler wants: The GOOD STUFF he
calls it.”
“Speaking
of Ursula’s good stuff, Irene; how’s my bench doing? That’s still at the store right?”
“It’s
still there and I’m having Kevin move it into your space as soon as it’s
ready. And it’s not good
stuff. You paid too much for it
and your never gonna sell it for a profit. I told you that the day you bought it. I don’t care what you think it is: It’s an old bench and it’s ugly. The sooner I get that away from my
things the better. That’s going to
be the first thing in your new store Toni and I bet Kevin has already moved it
there!”
“OH!”
“Well. If your gonna have half the store I
don’t want to have your stuff on my side.
That’s only fair. I’ve
marked everything for Kevin to move.
Also. You’ve got to start
paying me now. Even though your
not open yet I’ve still have to pay Kevin.”
“But
how am I gonna sell anything if it’s not ready. The two whole rooms MUST be painted. I’m not going to put ANYTHING in until
they are. I can’t sell in there
like with the walls like THAT.”
“Toni. I’ve never painted ANYTHING in that
store and nobody cares. If you
want to paint those rooms that’s fine but you still have to pay your half of
the rent AND pay Kevin. The only
reason I’m letting you in there is because OF Kevin. He’s older now and he’s married and if we don’t pay him more
money he’ll LEAVE. And then what
will I do? I can’t find anyone who
works like him AND watches the store.”
“I
like Kevin.”
“Of
course you like him. Everyone
likes him. But he’s gonna buy a
house in Mount Vernon and his wife is gonna have a baby. He’s grown UP! I’ve got to pay him more. I’ve RAISED him to do this. And he’s GOOD. In fact. I don’t know what I’d do without him. Now that I’m letting you in... . The only reason I am is to pay Kevin
more and you know that. And your
not gonna sit shop. You know that
and I know that. That’s what the problem is for you in
Nyack is anyway. But you don’t
have to be there either.”
“I’m
still keeping that. I’ve got so
much stuff now. And I can’t keep
it at home. Oh God. Brian doesn’t stop on the
basement. OH! Irene. I mean: All I
have is my antiques. But he HATES
the stuff. He thinks, like, I’m
suppose to make his dinner. I tell
him look: I HAVE A LIFE. He doesn’t care. He comes home; he wants booze, food and
the remote. On the weekends it’s
golf. I HATE GOLF! I’m never playing golf EVER AGAIN. THAT’S FINE he says. Now he’s pissed about the furniture in
the garage. I told him LOOK it’s
on MY SIDE and I’ll park the car OUTSIDE.
He thinks the car’s gonna get stolen. IT’S NOT gonna get stolen I tell him so he says it looks
weird and the neighbors don’t like it.
THE NEIGHBORS CAN’T EVEN SEE IT I say. HE says they can.
HOW can they see it?
They’re across the STREET.
They can see the car he says.
BUT IT’S A CAR: BIG DEAL I
say. I’m gonna get rid of him,
Irene.”
“Oh
your not gonna get rid of him Toni.
You love him and he loves you.”
“LOVE
HIM? It’s like loving a
...TELEVISION SET! He’s like. HE’S like having another KID. OH! He doesn’t do ANYTHING.”
“He
brings home a check doesn’t he. I
wish I still had one of those.”
“I
don’t need to have HIM actually BRING IT.
He could just drop it OFF.
I’ve thought about it: I
can live here and he lives in the city with his buddies. Or at the golf course. That’s what he wants you know: He wants one of those condos on the
edge of a golf course. That’s
where he wants to live when the kids leave. You know that don’t you?”
“Oh
that will be nice, Toni. You can
make cocktails and wait on them while he and his friends do what they call
OVERLOOK the 18th hole! HA! That’ll be the day I see you doing
that.”
“So
what am I gonna do? Something is
gonna go if he thinks I’m doing that and it’s better HIM NOW them ME on a GOLF
COURSE!”
“Have
you ever told him that?”
“NO! Talking about that...: I bring it up to him sometimes . He just sits there and looks at me like
I’m his GOLF BAG!”
“Oh,
now. Don’t be too hard on
him. Remember: HE thinks HE understands things. And YOU don’t. I used to live like that. God gives us booze and cigarettes: THAT’S what saves you. It SAVED ME! Why. I’d still
be Mrs. Fetch & Carry if it weren’t for those gospel saints. Keep him on those and you’ll soon be
free AND they STILL have to give you a check! That’s what I did.
I just sat there and never said a word. Then one day.
Well. I didn’t hear a
THING. So after a while I went out
to the garage and there he was; the end of all my problems. Of course it took me a few years to
realize just HOW great a moment that was but is really was. That was the first day of the rest of
MY life!”
“GOD
that would be GREAT. OH that would
just make it SO MUCH easier. NO
MORE THIS. No more THAT. WITH all the MONEY TOO! I could just BE! No one would say ANYTHING and if they
did it would just be HOW SORRY they ARE!
You are SO lucky!”
“A
lot of woman don’t see it that way you know. They say they’re alone. That’s because they don’t DO anything. Never did DO anything either. What a waste. Me. I knew
EXACTLY what I was going to do.
AND I DID IT. But I’d
already started. Just like
you! I was actually JUST like
you. Not as many kids though. But I did have a shop. And I had Kevin. And his mother. Poor old Minnie. But she was happy. And SHE was alone too. Of course she’d always been alone. Except for Kevin. And I saw to that. She always thanked me. “STILL CAN’T MAKE HIM A WHITE FOLK” but
“DAMN COULD BE!” she’d say. But
it’s still hard for him you know.
I feel responsible. And he
is GOOD. He’s really better than
most of the dealers. Why. I bet he has actually handled more good
things then ALL of them put together.
Tyler tried to hire him you know.
OFFERED him more money Kevin said.
But Kevin told me that he didn’t think the work would be the same. He said he doesn’t trust Tyler. He told me he thought he be out of a
job and then come back BEGGING to me.
I told him he’d never have to beg to ME. But I know what he meant. He has a good job with me and I know he knows it.”
“He’s
lucky. But. I suppose your lucky too. And I’m lucky. Now. When I think about it; just having him there. I mean; he’s THERE right NOW. That’s worth a lot. Especially because no one will bother
HIM.”
“What
do you mean no one will bother him.”
“Because
he’s Black. No one will bother
him. AND they know he works for
you.”
“Know
he works for me?”
“That
YOU own the store; they’re buying from YOU. They wouldn’t buy from him. YOU know that.”
“Why
wouldn’t they buy from Kevin?”
“Because
he’s Black.”
“Toni! What are you saying?”
“Black
people don’t know anything about art.
Everyone knows that!”
“Toni!”
“Well
it’s true! Where do you ever see
any Black dealers? Black
collectors? You don’t see any
because there AREN’T any”.
“Toni! There are TOO. I know lots of Black dealers. I BUY from them and THEY buy from me!”
“They
do not. When does a Black person
ever buy anything from you? I’ve
never even seen a Black person in your store”.
“What
about Mr. Quenelle? He’s ALWAYS in
the store. Everyday he comes in”.
“But
he never buys anything.”
“NEVER
BUYS ANYTHING! He bought every
piece of furniture in his house from me!
For years! He and his wife
have BEAUTIFUL things. WHY: I just told him how I wished I could
buy them all back for what I’d sold them for. TONI! I can’t
believe you saying this!”
“Well
I think it’s true. I never have
heard of a Black dealer except for junk dealers. Where are they if there are so many? How come I never see them?”
“Because,
obviously, you don’t know where to look!
That’s why. Your gonna be
surprised how MANY Black collectors come to my store. You’ll see.
They know very well what they’re doing. Most times they have BETTER taste then my WHITE collectors
because they’ve STUDIED harder.
That something YOU should do more of TOO.
“Well;
they won’t be buying anything from me then. I’m sure I don’t have anything they’ll want. What do I need to study for anyway. What should I study? I sell very well; very nice
things. I buy them. They sell.”
“Toni.
I didn’t know you felt like this!”
“Feel
like WHAT? Racist? I’m not racist. I’m just telling the truth; Black
people don’t buy antiques. They
don’t.”
“Your
wrong. YOU’LL see too. You just wait. And. Your also gonna find out that they know a lot more then YOU
do too. Some of the dealers have
been doing this a long time and know just what they’re doing. You talk to me after you’ve been in the
store a year or so and tell me THEN who are the best buyers.”
“I
don’t think I’ve ever sold a thing to a Black person. Matter of fact; I’ve never even BOUGHT something from
one. They don’t buy antiques
Irene. They may buy some of your
lamps and stuff but they don’t buy antiques.”
“They
don’t buy what you sell because all you buy are the things that your FRIENDS
buy for THEIR houses. That’s a
very SMALL market. You have to
remember that the art world is VERY big.
It’s not made up of just what your friends buy. Why: Didn’t you get upset when I bought that carved marble stone
from Mr. Cando? It was Latin;
written in Latin. And he said it
said a name of someone. Remember
that? And what happened to THAT! It’s in a MUSEUM in FRANCE now. Remember how your friend said it was
BROKEN! She didn’t like it she
said because it was broken. But it
was a ROMAN road marker! Remember
that? And Mr. Cando KNEW IT. He dug it up in a garden in Greenwich! Someone had put it there. Then they tore the whole garden
up! REMEMBER THAT? Mr. Cando brought ALL of the marble
here. Those people; the ones who
bought the house; they were just like your friends. And you for that matter. THEY didn’t know what THEY were doing. They AND YOU think all you do is buy
what you like. What you LIKE! You don’t even know what you LIKE let
alone anything about art; art history.
YOU thought that stone was broken JUST LIKE YOUR FRIEND. You hated it! AND THE REST OF THOSE STONES. But who KNEW.
Mr. Cando KNEW. HE know
more then YOU do about art Toni.
Just because you sell to your friends doesn’t mean ANYTHING. All you ever say about Mr. Cando is
that he’s Spanish and weeds gardens.
Why: That man has found
more good art with a leaf blower on his back than any dealer in Westchester!”
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