Thursday, May 10, 2018

Ask Nothing. Chapter Seven.


Ask Nothing.

The Best Antique I Ever Found
And
How I Found It.

By
A. Picker

Chapter Seven




            “Irene.  Do you think it’s Richard who offered Ursula more for the painting?”
            “No Toni.  But I do think I know who it might be and... well, we all know him including Richard.”
            “Really?  WHO?”
            “I’m not sure but.  On Saturday; last Saturday:  Mr. Cando (CAN-do) brought that breakfront I bought from Tyler over to the store.  I made him bring it right into the front of the shop.  Anyway.  He had to bring the valances too.  I bought those too.  Tyler wouldn’t sell those separately.  Tyler still thinks they go with the breakfront.  Anyway.  I bought those so Mr. Cando had to load those from over on Ferris.  When he went there he said that Richard was there and he was showing Tyler some photographs.”
            “THAT BASTARD!  OH!”
            “Now wait.  Mr. Cando said it was FURNITURE.  They were pictures from inside a house he said.  They let him look at them.  I think it’s that Gilman house; the one’s Richard knows who are moving.  Richard thinks their stuff is really good.  Anyway.  That’s what Mr. Cando told me and that Tyler was looking at them pretty hard.  But he’s not gonna want that stuff.  He knows better then that.  But he COULD have showed him a picture of the painting too.  If he really did take one.”
            “He TOOK ONE!.  Ursula wouldn’t say something like that.  She said he was going to show it to his auctioneer.  Can you believe that!  I’m gonna.  OH.  So you think Tyler could have made the big offer.  To Richard?  And he’s gonna tell Ursula?  He’d do that.  HE would.”
            “Mr. Cando didn’t say anything about a painting.  I mean:  I didn’t ASK him.  But you know how he is about paintings.  HE’D LOOK.  Mr. Cando LOVES paintings.  But:  You know what:  IF he’d seen a PAINTING don’t you think he’d of asked ME.  I mean.  HE shows me every painting he ever gets.  Right?  Just the other day he had the two landscapes.  OH they were awful!  But he LOVED them.  They were Italian.  With the crummy frames.  Especially if those two thought it was valuable.  HE’D LOOK.  Mr. Cando; ever since he sold that one portrait he thinks ANY painting is, you know THOUSANDS.”
            “But he didn’t say he saw a painting.”
            “That’s right.  But.  If Richard had a photo you know he’d show it to Tyler.  He knows Tyler won’t go to Ursula’s and he knows Tyler would know any painting well enough to give him a guess-to-mate.  Especially if it’s Ursula’s.  They’d try to screw her.  You know.  They don’t care.”
            “Well.  When I first saw it... I told her nothing at first.  I admit that.  Then I told her one sixty-five.  I didn’t do that right.  She knew it was better then that.  This time; when I was over there yesterday, the painting was gone.  She said she put it upstairs.  I didn’t see it.  Tyler wouldn’t go there do you think? 
            “Tyler go there?  But he hates Ursula.  You know what he calls her:  FILTHY LYING BLANK and I know what blank means!”
            “Poor Ursula.  I’m glad he doesn’t go there anymore.  WAIT A MINUTE!  You know what.  I BET he WOULD go there!  OH!” I said to Irene but it was really to myself.
            “But he hasn’t been there in years, Toni.  And he has Richard telling him everything.”
            “YES but he’d still GO THERE if that painting WAS GOOD.  I mean if it’s THAT GOOD.  Just because he doesn’t go there doesn’t mean he CAN’T go there.  THAT’S what he’d do!  He’d see Richard’s picture, Richard tell him it’s at Ursula’s and then he’d, you know, mutter something and... wait until Richard left and GO RIGHT OVER THERE.  WHY NOT!”.  As I said this I realized this is EXACTLY what was happening!
            “Toni.  He wouldn’t do THAT.  To Richard?”
            “WHAT!  Are you kidding me!  Of course he’d do that!  I’D DO THAT!
            “You’d do that?  Toni!  When would you ever do that?”
            “YOU’D DO IT!”
            “I’d do it?  No I wouldn’t.  I’d never do anything like that.”
            “You would to.  If you saw that painting you would.”
            “That is an idea Toni.  Maybe I SHOULD go there.  I know Ursula well enough.  She knows me.  I’d just say you told me about the painting and I can pay more then you!  That would fix you wouldn’t.”
            “YOU wouldn’t do THAT!  Irene.  Come on!”
            “But you just said I would.”
            “OH!  NOT like THAT!”
            “Well.  Like what then?”
            “WAIT A MINUTE.  That’s not a bad idea!  IRENE.  YOU COULD DO THAT!  Go to Ursula.  Say you heard about the painting.  Say I told you.  Say you’d told me you were going to go see it.  Say how you would know how much it’s worth!  She’d believe you!  She WOULD.  You know she thinks your, like, Mrs. QUALITY.  IRENE!  That’s IT.  We can do that.”
            “Toni.  We?”
            “NO.  REALLY.”
            “Toni.  Mr. Cando is probably doing THAT TOO.”
            “Mr. Cando isn’t going to Ursula to buy the painting.  Come ON.”
            “But he goes there all the time Toni.  He brings her his things.  You know that.”
            “But Ursula doesn’t show him anything.  Even Ursula knows he won’t pay anything.  He doesn’t have any money.”
            “But he could SEE it.  And tell Tyler”.
            “You know what!  If Mr. Cando saw that painting I bet he WOULDN’T tell Tyler because HE’D want it so bad.  Mr. Cando would DIE if he saw that painting.”
            “Oh... now... it’s that good Toni?  Mr. Cando would want it for his collection?  Mr. Cando knows nothing about painting.  HE wants EVERY painting for his collection just because he figured out it IS a painting.  It’s really a good painting Toni?”
            “Well.  Not THAT good but good enough for Richard.  For Tyler.  For me.  And that’s good enough for Mr. Cando.  I BET it’s Tyler whose seen it.  And he’d start his line on Ursula about the auctioneer.  He’s always putting stuff in auction.  EVERYTHING he has is gonna go to auction; you know his lines:  That where it brings the most.  I can just hear him.”
            “Yes Toni, but... this time... I don’t know.  He hates Ursula and even Richard knows it.  Ursula won’t sell anything of her mother’s and that’s all Tyler wants:  The GOOD STUFF he calls it.”
            “Speaking of Ursula’s good stuff, Irene; how’s my bench doing?  That’s still at the store right?”
            “It’s still there and I’m having Kevin move it into your space as soon as it’s ready.  And it’s not good stuff.  You paid too much for it and your never gonna sell it for a profit.  I told you that the day you bought it.  I don’t care what you think it is:  It’s an old bench and it’s ugly.  The sooner I get that away from my things the better.  That’s going to be the first thing in your new store Toni and I bet Kevin has already moved it there!”
            “OH!”
            “Well.  If your gonna have half the store I don’t want to have your stuff on my side.  That’s only fair.  I’ve marked everything for Kevin to move.  Also.  You’ve got to start paying me now.  Even though your not open yet I’ve still have to pay Kevin.”
            “But how am I gonna sell anything if it’s not ready.  The two whole rooms MUST be painted.  I’m not going to put ANYTHING in until they are.  I can’t sell in there like with the walls like THAT.”
            “Toni.  I’ve never painted ANYTHING in that store and nobody cares.  If you want to paint those rooms that’s fine but you still have to pay your half of the rent AND pay Kevin.  The only reason I’m letting you in there is because OF Kevin.  He’s older now and he’s married and if we don’t pay him more money he’ll LEAVE.  And then what will I do?  I can’t find anyone who works like him AND watches the store.”
            “I like Kevin.”
            “Of course you like him.  Everyone likes him.  But he’s gonna buy a house in Mount Vernon and his wife is gonna have a baby.  He’s grown UP!  I’ve got to pay him more.  I’ve RAISED him to do this.  And he’s GOOD.  In fact.  I don’t know what I’d do without him.  Now that I’m letting you in... .  The only reason I am is to pay Kevin more and you know that.  And your not gonna sit shop.  You know that and I know that.  That’s what the problem is for you in Nyack is anyway.  But you don’t have to be there either.”
            “I’m still keeping that.  I’ve got so much stuff now.  And I can’t keep it at home.  Oh God.  Brian doesn’t stop on the basement.  OH!  Irene.  I mean:  All I have is my antiques.  But he HATES the stuff.  He thinks, like, I’m suppose to make his dinner.  I tell him look:  I HAVE A LIFE.  He doesn’t care.  He comes home; he wants booze, food and the remote.  On the weekends it’s golf.  I HATE GOLF!  I’m never playing golf EVER AGAIN.  THAT’S FINE he says.  Now he’s pissed about the furniture in the garage.  I told him LOOK it’s on MY SIDE and I’ll park the car OUTSIDE.  He thinks the car’s gonna get stolen.  IT’S NOT gonna get stolen I tell him so he says it looks weird and the neighbors don’t like it.  THE NEIGHBORS CAN’T EVEN SEE IT I say.  HE says they can.  HOW can they see it?  They’re across the STREET.  They can see the car he says.  BUT IT’S A CAR:  BIG DEAL I say.  I’m gonna get rid of him, Irene.”
            “Oh your not gonna get rid of him Toni.  You love him and he loves you.”
            “LOVE HIM?  It’s like loving a ...TELEVISION SET!  He’s like.  HE’S like having another KID.  OH!  He doesn’t do ANYTHING.”
            “He brings home a check doesn’t he.  I wish I still had one of those.”
            “I don’t need to have HIM actually BRING IT.  He could just drop it OFF.  I’ve thought about it:  I can live here and he lives in the city with his buddies.  Or at the golf course.  That’s what he wants you know:  He wants one of those condos on the edge of a golf course.  That’s where he wants to live when the kids leave.  You know that don’t you?”
            “Oh that will be nice, Toni.  You can make cocktails and wait on them while he and his friends do what they call OVERLOOK the 18th hole!  HA!  That’ll be the day I see you doing that.”
            “So what am I gonna do?  Something is gonna go if he thinks I’m doing that and it’s better HIM NOW them ME on a GOLF COURSE!”
            “Have you ever told him that?”
            “NO!  Talking about that...:  I bring it up to him sometimes .  He just sits there and looks at me like I’m his GOLF BAG!”
            “Oh, now.  Don’t be too hard on him.  Remember:  HE thinks HE understands things.  And YOU don’t.  I used to live like that.  God gives us booze and cigarettes:  THAT’S what saves you.  It SAVED ME!  Why.  I’d still be Mrs. Fetch & Carry if it weren’t for those gospel saints.  Keep him on those and you’ll soon be free AND they STILL have to give you a check!  That’s what I did.  I just sat there and never said a word.  Then one day.  Well.  I didn’t hear a THING.  So after a while I went out to the garage and there he was; the end of all my problems.  Of course it took me a few years to realize just HOW great a moment that was but is really was.  That was the first day of the rest of MY life!”
            “GOD that would be GREAT.  OH that would just make it SO MUCH easier.  NO MORE THIS.  No more THAT.  WITH all the MONEY TOO!  I could just BE!  No one would say ANYTHING and if they did it would just be HOW SORRY they ARE!  You are SO lucky!”
            “A lot of woman don’t see it that way you know.  They say they’re alone.  That’s because they don’t DO anything.  Never did DO anything either.  What a waste.  Me.  I knew EXACTLY what I was going to do.  AND I DID IT.  But I’d already started.  Just like you!  I was actually JUST like you.  Not as many kids though.  But I did have a shop.  And I had Kevin.  And his mother.  Poor old Minnie.  But she was happy.  And SHE was alone too.  Of course she’d always been alone.  Except for Kevin.  And I saw to that.  She always thanked me.  “STILL CAN’T MAKE HIM A WHITE FOLK” but “DAMN COULD BE!” she’d say.  But it’s still hard for him you know.  I feel responsible.  And he is GOOD.  He’s really better than most of the dealers.  Why.  I bet he has actually handled more good things then ALL of them put together.  Tyler tried to hire him you know.  OFFERED him more money Kevin said.  But Kevin told me that he didn’t think the work would be the same.  He said he doesn’t trust Tyler.  He told me he thought he be out of a job and then come back BEGGING to me.  I told him he’d never have to beg to ME.  But I know what he meant.  He has a good job with me and I know he knows it.”
            “He’s lucky.  But.  I suppose your lucky too.  And I’m lucky.  Now.  When I think about it; just having him there.  I mean; he’s THERE right NOW.  That’s worth a lot.  Especially because no one will bother HIM.”
            “What do you mean no one will bother him.”
            “Because he’s Black.  No one will bother him.  AND they know he works for you.”
            “Know he works for me?”
            “That YOU own the store; they’re buying from YOU.  They wouldn’t buy from him.  YOU know that.”
            “Why wouldn’t they buy from Kevin?”
            “Because he’s Black.”
            “Toni!  What are you saying?”
            “Black people don’t know anything about art.  Everyone knows that!”
            “Toni!”
            “Well it’s true!  Where do you ever see any Black dealers?  Black collectors?  You don’t see any because there AREN’T any”.
            “Toni!  There are TOO.  I know lots of Black dealers.  I BUY from them and THEY buy from me!”
            “They do not.  When does a Black person ever buy anything from you?  I’ve never even seen a Black person in your store”.
            “What about Mr. Quenelle?  He’s ALWAYS in the store.  Everyday he comes in”.
            “But he never buys anything.”
            “NEVER BUYS ANYTHING!  He bought every piece of furniture in his house from me!  For years!  He and his wife have BEAUTIFUL things.  WHY:  I just told him how I wished I could buy them all back for what I’d sold them for.  TONI!  I can’t believe you saying this!”
            “Well I think it’s true.  I never have heard of a Black dealer except for junk dealers.  Where are they if there are so many?  How come I never see them?”
            “Because, obviously, you don’t know where to look!  That’s why.  Your gonna be surprised how MANY Black collectors come to my store.  You’ll see.  They know very well what they’re doing.  Most times they have BETTER taste then my WHITE collectors because they’ve STUDIED harder.  That something YOU should do more of TOO.
            “Well; they won’t be buying anything from me then.  I’m sure I don’t have anything they’ll want.  What do I need to study for anyway.  What should I study?  I sell very well; very nice things.  I buy them.  They sell.”
            “Toni.  I didn’t know you felt like this!”
            “Feel like WHAT?  Racist?  I’m not racist.  I’m just telling the truth; Black people don’t buy antiques.  They don’t.”
            “Your wrong.  YOU’LL see too.  You just wait.  And.  Your also gonna find out that they know a lot more then YOU do too.  Some of the dealers have been doing this a long time and know just what they’re doing.  You talk to me after you’ve been in the store a year or so and tell me THEN who are the best buyers.”
            “I don’t think I’ve ever sold a thing to a Black person.  Matter of fact; I’ve never even BOUGHT something from one.  They don’t buy antiques Irene.  They may buy some of your lamps and stuff but they don’t buy antiques.”
            “They don’t buy what you sell because all you buy are the things that your FRIENDS buy for THEIR houses.  That’s a very SMALL market.  You have to remember that the art world is VERY big.  It’s not made up of just what your friends buy.  Why:  Didn’t you get upset when I bought that carved marble stone from Mr. Cando?  It was Latin; written in Latin.  And he said it said a name of someone.  Remember that?  And what happened to THAT!  It’s in a MUSEUM in FRANCE now.  Remember how your friend said it was BROKEN!  She didn’t like it she said because it was broken.  But it was a ROMAN road marker!  Remember that?  And Mr. Cando KNEW IT.  He dug it up in a garden in Greenwich!  Someone had put it there.  Then they tore the whole garden up!  REMEMBER THAT?  Mr. Cando brought ALL of the marble here.  Those people; the ones who bought the house; they were just like your friends.  And you for that matter.  THEY didn’t know what THEY were doing.  They AND YOU think all you do is buy what you like.  What you LIKE!  You don’t even know what you LIKE let alone anything about art; art history.  YOU thought that stone was broken JUST LIKE YOUR FRIEND.  You hated it!  AND THE REST OF THOSE STONES.  But who KNEW.  Mr. Cando KNEW.  HE know more then YOU do about art Toni.  Just because you sell to your friends doesn’t mean ANYTHING.  All you ever say about Mr. Cando is that he’s Spanish and weeds gardens.  Why:  That man has found more good art with a leaf blower on his back than any dealer in Westchester!”







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