Friday, May 30, 2014

"It's Been Two Years" - Part Eleven - "Bark Mulch" - "The Opposite Direction" - (A)

"It's Been Two Years"

Part Eleven

"Bark Mulch" - "The Opposite Direction"


            Seated... with Cadence in her shed doorway of her ancestral ‘old New England sea captain’s mansion’... and having just completed my ‘reason for stopping by’... and KNOWING that NOW is the proper, appropriate, considerate and sensitive moment to “GET OUT” and “vamoose”... and:
            I know I am, as an antiques picker, ‘in’ to this ‘this estate’.  I do not have to worry or peddle around about that.  I just have to ‘go along’ and “SHE’LL” “show me everything”.  I know that.  I’ve ‘done that’ hundreds of times before... with ‘estates’ and their ‘peoples’.  I “AM” the doing that.  AND the ‘know to “GET OUT” of the doing that... TOO.
            But this time I do not.
            I go in the ...opposite direction.
            And I should not do that and I should ‘do know that’; not to... and I DO know that too but
            The Opposite Direction...
            Is a title of a THE SUBJECT that is the IS of the “WHY?”.  The opposite direction is... where... I go... and ‘want to go’
            For ME.
            And that is simply because that... NOW... that I am seated THERE... in the shed doorway... THERE... with Cadence... and us alone... WE are at an ‘at drift’ THERE that is the opposite direction of the
            “THAT”... and its ‘et al’
            “OVER THERE”
            (WE can actually ‘see it’ ‘off’’ “OVER THERE” from where we sit... not speaking for a moment...; together... just gazing off “OVER THERE”.
            I don’t want to leave.
            That is...:  “GO BACK”
            To join the rest of “IT”
            In a... “Food Court”
            Of “This is now...; our... NEW... New England”.

            So I say to Cadence...with the sly and the topical ‘choose’ skill:
            “How ARE the CATS.”
            “OH.” she says
            And she STANDS UP.
            “LET’S GO SEE!”
            And... I stand up
            We ‘go’... in the opposite direction.
            And then again in the opposite direction:
            First ‘inside’ the shed and then ‘turn to the left’ to go through the doorway to the (DARK) back shed... and then across the dark floor to the dark back doorway that is open so the spring greenery from this open door ‘outside’ IS the colored light WE see together as we travel... together... ‘down the isle’ of the ‘opposite direction’... ‘together’.
Who sits where?

The (old beat-up mixed mosh of ‘seating furniture’) “chairs” are the same sort as at the FRONT SHED DOOR and are... arranged the same TOO; at the proper “THE ANGLE” to allow the seated to “SEE OUT” and the “see in” to have “difficulty” ‘doing that and:
There are three chairs; ‘by the doorway’, ‘the middle’, ‘the third one’.  And some other less comfortable ‘stick chairs’ ‘stuck around’.  Too.  Cadence sits in ‘the middle’ chair.  “WHICH?” do I?
Or is it... “WITCH?”.
There IS an etiquette in old New England shed door sitting.
There is... and isn’t that DULL... for old New England reading; to be a reader of “WHERE TO SIT” in the barn shed of the ...old New England ...sea captain’s mansion... when accompanying the estate heiress to ‘SEE’ her cats. It’s just “SOOOO” “Opposite Direction”.  (“OMG”).
So don’t read about it.  Go BACK to the food court “OVER THERE”.

            Cadence, properly, promptly sits herself first... in the middle chair.  The ‘by the doorway’ chair is ‘left empty’ for I, properly and promptly, sit to Cadence’s left in the ‘third chair’.  The doorway chair is reserved for seating ‘a visitor’ who COMES TO this back shed door from ‘out there’.  It is ‘left empty for them’ TO SIT IN ... there.  I sit in the SHADOW of ‘the middle chair’ that is “FOR” the ...peoples such as Cadence on THEIR property.  OTHERS, should there be others in the domestic party, either ‘stand’ or ‘sit’ in ...THEY fetch and move ‘it’; an (uncomfortable) ‘stick chair’.  AGAIN:  THESE CHAIRS ARE ALL “The (old beat-up mixed mosh of ‘seating furniture’) chairs”; the old “I don’t know where they (past generations) came from” chairs.  To many eyes they would be (“authentic”) “ANTIQUES”.  NO “NEW” (especially ‘sets of’) “CHAIRS”:  NO:  Or... back to the food court... FOR YOU.

            So I sit next to Cadence on her left.  I do not waffle in doing this.  I know what to do and where to sit.  IF... one is
            “OFFERED” that first ‘doorway’ chair... by... and only by... the Cadence of the party... IT IS REFUSED.  Commonly... it is not refused and... usually it is unknown to the person who ‘not refused’ (and who commonly DOES sit in it)... an actual insult to be offered that chair because... well:  “They don’t know any better” meaning that the offered... does not know the shed door seating etiquette... for they are ‘is from away”, “NOT raised right”, “doesn’t know” and may be displayed as being that (a “guest” “from away”) by the host or hostess BY ‘being seated’ in THAT CHAIR... and that similar to ...wearing the letter “A” sewed to one’s breast (both female AND male) in ‘old New England’.

            WE... Cadence and I, accomplish all this old New England Wasp seated signaling without comment or notice and are ‘so there seated’ ‘looking out’ and ‘saying nothing’.  “Saying nothing” is part of this seating ritual too:  “ANY idiot” who ‘says’ or ‘has to say’ something about ‘WHICH CHAIR DO I SIT IN?”, etc.... “back to the food court... OVER THERE”.

            I... am gonna go with the “I believe” I have just written out the ‘this’ of an old New England home etiquette ...for a ‘the first time’ (?).  I’ve never seen this ‘written down... soooo... MIND IT... including the “IF there is an actual old and good and rare ‘oriental’ ‘rug’ on the floor ‘there’ or a true ‘antique chair’ THERE... TOO... do not make an ASS of yourself by commenting on it in any way let alone trying to purloin it...
            AND there are MORE hidden nuances and pit falls.  IF you are NEW or “FIRST TIME”... shut up and take it in as a WHOLE play-opera-ballet-musical (chairs) and ‘grace of God’.  IT; the seating ‘by the back shed door’, is ‘over’ in ‘seconds’.

            There is, following the seating ...silence ...and the green light window of the open doorway from ‘out there’.  There is nothing there...; no “else”.
            And today
            There are no cats... in sight.
            There is... only...
            The double wide ...dump truck tire marks... in the abutting neighbor’s side yard where a ...dump truck... has recently “DUMPED” (at the end of the tire marks) a ...dump truck load... of “Bark Mulch” two thirds of the way back and in the middle of... ‘that yard’ (“his yard”).  This dump placement aligns itself ‘perfect’ for ‘being able to see it (the mulch load mound) from Cadence’s ...back shed door.  The neighbor’s bark mulch mound IS the ‘view of’ in the center of the, otherwise, green light.

            Cadence quickly speaks of the bark mulch pile.  “THE cats have discovered it”.  The neighbor has discovered their discovery.  HE has spoken to Cadence of the cat’s ‘interest’ and ‘discovery’.  Cadence denied any “doings” with the cats and the neighbor’s bark mulch mound.  They (the cats) are, she reminds, “not her cats.  Anyway”.  “Cats do whatever they want”.

            Bark mulch mounds (“piles”) dumped from dump trucks... then “SPREAD” and then... viewed with accomplished satisfaction... by the mulch landscaped... home... owner... are ...a ...bane: a fatal poison... to the ‘old New England’ (landscape) eye.  The whole process is a bane; not ‘just the mulch’.
            I observe to Cadence.

            “Bane” she said... she hadn’t used yet to express her feeling that it (bark mulch and its process) ARE a... BANE.  “IT KILLS THE WEEDS” they TELL me.  WHY do you want to KILL THE WEEDS I asked.  OH they say so you do not have to WEED.  OH I say then what do you do then?  SPREAD the BARK MULCH?  BUT IT LOOKS so GOOD they say... when it is all spread.  LOOKS GOOD I say to the NO ONE who DOES NOT KNOW how a GARDEN actually LOOKS.  It is NOT a garden they say.  OH what IS it?  It is a LANDSCAPE... beautiful... they believe.  IT is, your quite correct, a BANE... to the gardener’s EYE.  I MUST remember THAT WORD.”
            She said (Cadence said).
            “I”, said I, “agree”.

            “He (the neighbor) has MEN come who wear all the same (orange) shirts and will spread it (the mulch) all over.  They spread it all over the same spots every year now.  In the fall they rake it up or blow it away with the LEAVES blower.  I told them to blow the LEAVES over HERE.  They all wear their matching shirts when they do that TOO.  One of them said he would give me my own shirt to wear and he DID!  I always wear it when I talk with them (the neighbor’s landscape crew).  They get paid very well to do all this I’ve learned.”

            I... viewing Cadence’s own back shed door foreground-to-property-line ...landscaping...:  I could see the abundance of untended, undisturbed and ...dense ...mulching of old dead leaves all over the bottoms of the view from the rear shed door.  No ‘leaf blowing’.

            No ‘Bark Mulch’
            At old New England homes.
            “Weeding” is done
            At old New England homes.
            If ‘anything’ is done
            At old New England homes.
            “Over grown” “with WEEDS” is
            The Opposite Direction
            At old New England homes.


  1. I sit in my barn door, looking, not too far away, at the edge where field meets forest, no one knows enough to join me, no one knows how to join me, THEY come by and try to TALK; I sigh, spit, fart, tilt my head back and momentarily close my eyes, please go away.
    Note: The use of BARK MULCH is a sin in my church.

  2. Ergh... my family goes back at least six generations in New England and I use mulch, sometimes made of shredded tree bark, and so did my mother and my grandmother before her (can't say about my great-grandmother and on back after that, suspect that the previous generations were too busy to do much gardening for fun). It amends the soil, preserves water, keeps tender shoots from freezing, and makes my phlox and delphiniums happy. Not sure what the harm is in that. DYED bark mulch is the sin in our eyes.